The Only Twentysomething in the Village
When I am home, my walk to church on a Sunday takes about four minutes: out the door, down the lane behind our house that runs alongside the primary school I went to and then up the road through an avenue of lime trees to the grey steepled church. From outside it looks big, in reality it can seat about 100 at a push. Usually we get about forty including a handful of children.
This is my spiritual family. I have moved around a lot in the past five years and so have not been able to settle long term in any other church. These people know me, pray for me, support me financially, make me feel cherished every time I walk through the door. I love the feeling of community here, of being a small group of people of many generations and classes coming together to worship God with our lives.
Our village is small, centered around the green in the typical English way. We have a primary school of sixty children, a small smoky village pub, a newly built village hall for all our jumble sales and Christmas pantomimes, and a small sports pitch for the village football (*soccer) team in winter and cricket team in summer. There is an obvious difference between those families who have lived in the village for generations and those wealthier families attracted to the village lifestyle and able to afford the booming property prices. And yet there is a strong sense of community despite these differences.
The challenges for our little congregation however are huge. The first thing you will notice in the village is the diminishing number of people in their twenties. There is no bus in our village—you have to walk the fifteen minutes to the main road and flag one down—so learning to drive at 17 is like a ticket to freedom. People leave as soon as they finish school, either to find work elsewhere or just because they cannot afford to buy a home in the village. In our church my sister and I are the only people between the age of 16 and about 35, and the number of people between 35 and 50 are only a few couples.
I am passionate about this church but it is shrinking as the older beloved members of our congregation are dying, and the younger members are either moving out of the village, or to a new church to find people their age, or youth work for their children. There is a growing number of resources for people our age about vibrant ministry and service possibilities or exciting small group ideas. But what about those young people who are standing alone for their generation in their church? I do not feel it will benefit my church for me to leave. But how do I get fed, how do I reach out to people my age, when it seems as if my small rural church has little to offer to someone of my generation? And how do I do it all by myself? I get so much from the fellowship of older Christians and I see God is working in their lives, but there it is so hard to know how to be an effective church when your tiny congregation is such a diverse and disheartened bunch.
I don’t really know the answer to my own question. But maybe someone else here has ideas. Are you here because there is a large group of twenty-somethings needing direction, inspiring and resourcing in your church? Or perhaps are you here, like me, because you’re on your own and looking for encouragement to keep going? I would love to hear your thoughts.
About the Author
Fiona is from rural England, not far from the dreaming spires of Oxford. She works as a policy and advocacy assistant for an international development network and is passionate about village life—weird pub games, your neighbor leaving buckets of apples outside your door in autumn and everyone knowing your big news before you do.
There has been 1 reply so far
Fiona,
I want to encourage you. I am a 40-something lurking here at Threads, but I can understand your situation. I’ve been there as a 20-something, and I am now experiencing much the same situation where I am now.
My husband is the pastor of my church and we live next door to the church building which is the same size as yours. When we first came here 2 years ago, our worship service attendance was the same as yours. Our four children quadrupled the size of the children’s department when we came!
Our house and the church sit across the street from the city park where the melon festival is held every year, where kids play baseball in the spring, and soccer in the summer, and where birthday parties and family picnics occur almost every weekend. The difference between those families is that some are wealthy farmers who have lived here for generations, and some are farm laborers who followed the crops until they landed here and decided to provide their families with the stability of permanent residence. However, many from both groups are moving away attracted to the city lifestyle and/or more stable employment. Our young people escape to the city in search of higher education or fleeing the life of the field worker for city jobs. Our public school system is losing enrollment at the rate of 90 or more per year as people move looking for better employment, or better housing, or the conveniences of city life.
Yes, the challenges are huge. In our church we have about 4 people between the age of 16 and 35. When we first came, I was the only adult attending our Bible Study under the age of 50!
Both when I was the only twentysomething, and again when I found myself the only fortysomething, I felt the Lord tugging at my heart when I heard my own words ringing in my ears, “How do I get fed?” The only answer I’ve ever found is, “Feed My sheep.” (John 21:15) What that has meant for me, was to feed myself by preparing to feed others. When I was twentysomething, I started by praying for a Bible study group and sharing my desire with my pastor. Many weeks I sat alone and prayed and studied by Bible, but the Lord kept the desire in my heart and I kept inviting people to come. Because there weren’t many people in town my age, I did not focus on age, but on people desiring to grow spiritually. The class eventually grew to about 8-10 people ages 18-35.
Now as a fortysomething, I again have felt God’s prompting to feed myself by feeding others. Our church sent postcards out to people in town, and asked older church members to spread the word. I now teach an eclectic group made of thirtysomethings and sixtysomethings, new believers and those grown up in the Word. From this group 3 couples have emerged to lead a community ministry which now reaches 60-75 high school students each week in prayer, Bible study, and fellowship. God will do great things if we just follow the desires He puts in our hearts!
The Lord has put a love for this group of believers in your heart. I do not believe He would have you to leave them. You are not alone. You have the Lord, your sister, and your church family. You have much to offer others of your generation. You have Jesus! Never try to do it all by yourself. Rely on the Holy Spirit. Ask your pastor and your church family to support you in prayer. Ask your sister to partner with you in a venture of faith, step out of the way, and watch what God will do. Perhaps you are the one to ignite a spark of encouragement in your faith family!
Partnering With You in Prayer, Sandy
1 | Sandy B
Thursday, December 6, 2007, at 5:30pm
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