The Discipline of Solitude

When you hear the word solitude, what feelings does it evoke in you? Splendor, wonderment, intimacy, or joy? How about absolute delight or excitement and expectation?

Yeah. Not likely.

For many of us, solitude is our secret nemesis. Though we might not speak of it often, it’s never far from our thoughts. Each of us, in our own ways, work hard every week to fight it off with the same zeal we fight off sickness or poverty. We fill our schedules with social engagements, keep ourselves busy to the point of exhaustion, and fill our minds with reality TV, news, music, or books - often not even realizing the powerful influence our aversion to solitude is having on our choices. We might not actually want such frenetically busy lives. But at least it’s better than the alternative. Isn’t it?

We tend to associate seasons of solitude with loneliness, isolation, and even hopelessness. So it’s no wonder that when Jesus beckons us away to spend time alone, we often resist the call. But when at last we answer, we’re surprised to find that the solitude Jesus wants for us is not a futile exercise in loneliness but rather a life-giving practice that enriches our hearts with the powerful gifts of clarity, cleansing, and strength.

The Clarity of Solitude

There are some things you cannot know except through stillness, like the glory of a flower, the calming music of the surf upon the sand, or the deep beauty of God’s infinite power in your heart. We might be conscious of God while rushing about in our typical flurry of busyness and demands, but it’s only as we willingly step into seasons of stillness and solitude that we truly come to understand who He is. He is not the sort of art that can be known with a passing glance.

To know Him truly requires a quiet space and attentive focus - a willingness to watch and listen until the revelation comes. “Like a servant’s eyes on His master’s hand, like a servant girl’s eyes on her mistress’s hand, so our eyes are on the Lord our God until He shows us favor” (Ps. 123:2). Some of His most beautiful gifts come only through stillness.

The stillness of solitude brings clarity to more than just our knowledge of God. It also awakens our awareness of our own hearts. And that’s perhaps why we avoid it. We run from solitude to the degree that we run from ourselves. For solitude opens the window to your soul and releases all that has been quietly sealed up and hidden away inside. We fear what might be there, lurking in the dark, hidden by our busy lives—sorrow, loneliness, desperation, grief, and weariness. But we do not understand that God’s call to solitude is not a call to go off by ourselves to face our struggles alone. It’s the call to come away with Him, so that He can minister to our souls and give us the healing gift of Himself. “Come to Me, all of you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. All of you, take up My yoke and learn from Me, because I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for yourselves” (Matt. 11:28-29).

When was the last time you went off alone to sit in stillness before the Lord—with no agenda at all other than to watch and listen for what He wants to reveal?

Schedule a few hours this week and disappear from your life. Find a beautiful place and let yourself be silent before Him.

The Cleansing of Solitude

What was it that compelled Jesus to spend so much time alone? What was the hunger that drove Him to solitude? Read through the Gospels and you’ll notice that on many occasions, Jesus withdrew to lonely places when He was weary or when people began to press Him to do or be something that was not true to who He was. (See Mark 6:31-46 and John 6:14-15.)

We all need times of cleansing and refreshing—seasons in which we get away from the pressures and burdens that the world continually tries to lay upon our souls. We need to reconnect with what’s most true and real about who we are in the world and who God is in our lives.

I’m not talking about taking a vacation. Even a glance at Jesus’ example tells us that taking two weeks each year in the Bahamas or on the mountains of Colorado is not nearly enough to satisfy our soul’s need for the cleansing and refreshment of solitude. For Christ, these solitary escapes were a regular and frequent part of His life. How much more, then, they should be for us. Surely the responsibilities of our lives are not more vitally important than His were. He was responsible for the salvation of the world. And yet He made the time for solitude, because He knew it was critical to the success of His calling and the life of His soul.

How would your life be different if you could escape from the world one full day out of each month and refresh your soul in solitude with God? What do you imagine would change? What would have to change to allow that time to happen?

Jesus has provided the example to follow. He has issued the invitation. What will it take for you to say yes?

Pull out your calendar right now and schedule a full day of solitude sometime in the next month. Choose a place to go that is away from the crowds, and lay plans for a full day with Jesus. Read, meditate, pray, sing, journal, go for a hike—do whatever your soul desires. But do it alone with Him.

The Power of Solitude

The experience of purposeful solitude reconnects us with ourselves and God. It brings clarity to our hearts and refreshment to our souls. Anyone who pursues solitude—even for a short season—will experience this. But for those who embrace the practice of solitude as a regular discipline in their lives, there’s a deeper and more powerful gift to be received.

For those who make solitude a habit, the discipline becomes more than merely something you do. Solitude becomes a place you go - a sacred space set apart from the world and reserved for you and God alone. Like Moses in the tent of meeting, our solitude becomes a private, holy place of intimacy with God. And as with Moses, it brings not only clarity and refreshment to our souls but also transformation and power.

The practice of regular solitude with God changes us. We come to know that we’re loved in a way we never imagined. We see not only who He is and who we are but also who we’re becoming because of Him. Through the mystical communion of solitude, we come to bear the power and love of God in our hearts and on our faces in a way that no other means can accomplish. Rather than using solitude as a means to escape the world, it becomes the means by which the kingdom of God is brought into the world. For we become the vessels through which His power and glory are expressed.