The Spiritual Act of Conversation

After at least 20 years of being a Christian and over 15 years serving in ministry, God has recently hit me upside the head with a profound thought: I need other people. Yeah, I know, it doesn’t sound so profound, but let me elaborate a little.

I accepted Christ as a teenager, and like many others before & after me I struggled in those turbulent adolescent years trying to figure out where my faith fit into my everyday life. I had some wonderful leaders in my life who helped plant me into God’s Word and into some spiritual disciplines that have shaped who I am ever since. I learned how to read and study my Bible. I learned how to pray and learned the importance of memorizing Scripture. In every sense of the modern application of what Discipleship entails, I was equipped with the ‘basics’ of the life of a Christ follower.

Those skills have served me well - although I struggle maintaining any of them on as regular basis as my conscience and the guilt therein remind me that I should.

The problem with these individual acts of a Disciple is just that - they’re individual. I can quietly and confidently follow Christ in the comfort and solitude of my room or a closet, away from the sharpening influence of other Christians.

Now, I know that these disciplines, when practiced, should affect all areas of my life - including my interaction with others. I also know that there is a place for getting alone in your ‘closet’ to commune with God (Matthew 6:6). But, when I boil it all down I’d have to admit that I have probably emphasized the individuality of my growth in Christ far more than emphasizing what it means to follow Him and grow in Him within the context of a community.

I’m Not Alone

As I work with other young adults, like myself, I’m finding more and more that I’m not alone. Apart from those who were not raised within a church atmosphere, the majority of us have a limited scope of what discipleship looks like and the view is slanted heavily to time alone (there it is again) with God.

Young adults know that this doesn’t quite feel right - especially when they are applying their faith to their innate need for relationships & community.

Without neglecting the former, may I beat the drum for an expanded look at what it means to grow in Christ? The vast majority of Scripture was written to communities of people - and those that were addressed to individuals were, by & large, intended to be passed along to others. There is an inherent communal aspect to our faith.

Spiritual Conversation

I see this played out week after week, as young adults in our church meet together for Bible study, go out for lunch or coffee, or come together in someone’s living room to play games together. People sharing their stories and relaying what God has been up to in their lives and what they have learned about Him.

If you are going to reach and minister to young adults, it is imperative that you learn how to incorporate spiritual conversation into your ministry. Here are a few things you can do to head down this important road:

1. Talk less, listen more

   This starts in any kind of Bible study or small group setting. These times cannot be dominated by the leader, and timing cannot be dictated by the lesson. Far too many teachers spend the majority of group time talking, and any kind of group discussion or dynamics if often times squelched in the interest of “getting the lesson done.” You must realize the value of the conversation - balancing the need to allow people to share with one another and knowing the right time to move along. If you’re not sure, you’re better erring on the side of listening too much.

   This also is an important principle in your interaction with young adults. They want to share their stories. They are interested in you and your own stories only as far as you allow them to interact. Learn to listen and you’ll set the stage for communal growth.

2. Foster an atmosphere of sharing

   Be willing to be transparent. Make it a practice to share your own stories. This is especially true if you are trying to convey a truth by using an illustration or example. Rote ‘out of the book’ illustrations will pale in comparison to sharing things about yourself & your own life.

3. Uplift the importance of our stories

   Existing on our own we will only come to know our awesome and unfathomable God in a limited way. We will only know as much of who He is as He has revealed Himself to us. Sharing our stories and listening to others’ stories of how they have come to know God expands and uplifts Who God is in our own lives and allows us to know Him more than we could on our own.