How to Build Community In Your Young Adult Ministry

This the tale of two churches who had a dream of reaching young adults.

Both had great, enthusiastic, visionary leaders. Both had great facilities. Both had fantastic worship leaders.

One ministry has succeeded beyond its founders’ wildest dreams. The other ministry is no longer in existence.

So, what made the difference? Relationships. Community. Connection.

When our LifeWay team went out to study Young Adult Ministry in churches, we had thought Community might be the highest priority. But we had no idea to what it extent it occupied the top spot. Seventy-three percent of church members and 47 percent of young adults outside the church told us community with other young adults is extremely important in their lives. That’s true of every generation, but it is particularly true of people in the 18 to 34 age group.

There is more mobility in life than ever before. There is more electronic correspondence and less real communication. There has never been a group of people whose parents have been more disengaged with their lives. There have never been more human tragedies faced by one young American generation: Columbine. Oklahoma City. 9-11. The War in Iraq. The War in Afghanistan. Material things and the American Dream don’t mean much stacked against these kind of life-shattering events. Relationships do. So, not surprisingly, community is No. 1.

The first church I referenced figured this out almost from Day One. Everything about this Young Adult gathering screams “RELATIONSHIP!” At this church, worship happens around tables. Ever tried to ignore people who are seated around a table with you? It’s impossible. You almost feel compelled to extend your hand and introduce yourself.

A coffee bar opens a half hour before the worship time begins and stays open until, well, I have never seen it close because I am an early-to-bed guy and everytime I have been to this gathering, coffee drinking and conversation has outlasted me by hours. It’s not unusual for things to keep going well beyond 10 pm. Christians get to know Christians. Christians get to know non-Christians. People find jobs. People find meaningful relationships. People ask each other God questions. Ordinary people find out that church staff members care about them. People are saved. People find hope. People pray for each other.

People find community, friendships, relationships. They find real life.

The other church? Great worship experience. Great speaker. But there wasn’t a good place to hang out before or after the service. Again, there were people there who wanted to make friends, foster community and generally get to know each other, but the design of the evening didn’t lead you that direction. That was the problem.

So what can you do to make building community No. 1 in your Young Adult Ministry?

1. Set-up environments where people can just hang out

   Provide coffee and refreshments. MAKE IT GOOD COFFEE! Drag in some couches. If you have a weekly worship gathering, open the doors early and keep them open late.

2. Set-up multiple Bible study communities weekly

   Do you have Sunday Bible study? Great. Do you have a mid-week Bible study time in a home where people can REALLY get to know each other? No? Add it. One hour a week is not enough time to build relationships.

3. Take your eyes off the clock

   Sometimes as leaders, we get focused on the time schedule. Bible study should be an hour. Worship should be 90 minutes. You are not running a two-minute drill like Tom Brady. You’re making friends. You’re learning about people. It takes time. So, make the time to do it.

4. Pray together as a community

   You should pray because, as Oswald Chambers stated, “it’s the highest work.” There is also the reality that nothing binds peoples’ hearts together like prayer. Make sure you spend the prayer time you need in Bible study, worship, service or whatever you’re doing. You’ll find relationships will bloom. It’s a God thing.