Don’t Go It Alone Any Longer

Do you go it alone? If you do, well, you aren’t alone.

In 2006, the American Sociological Review published a study called “Social Isolation in America,” and 25 percent of the people surveyed said they did not talk to anyone about significant life issues. One in five people had only one person they conversed with about the important things in life.

If you’ve dug into the Threads site at all, you know how important we believe community is to making today’s church relevant to 20- and 30-somethings, many of whom exist in this kind of isolation today. Social networking and the Internet feeds this kind of loneliness, as does media in general today.

John Burke, pastor of Gateway Church in Austin, Texas, and the author of No Perfect People Allowed (a must read for anyone in ministry), writes that we regularly “surf the Internet and browse through 1700 cable channels, all at the cost of relationships.”

He is absolutely correct.

My question for you is—what are you doing as a leader to guard yourself from this kind of isolation?

I know you because I am one of you. I know you…

• Care deeply for the people God has placed in your care and you have an open door to listen to their problems.
• Have a packed schedule that makes isolation easy to achieve.
• Most people you know have placed you on an unrealistic pedestal that makes it difficult for you to share with them that you are a flawed sinner, just like they are.
• Get so stressed out by the pressures of leadership that you medicate yourself through isolation.

You can’t keep moving in this direction—not without wounding yourself beyond repair or blowing up your ministry. It’s January, so it’s a good time to start doing things differently.

• Schedule a weekly time with a friend to talk. This isn’t an accountability group. Call it a supportive relationship if you like, but this is really friendship. Do it for yourself and your friend. Pray for each other.
• Find a friend in ministry to debrief, to de-stress and to exchange ideas. Talk about the challenges you face, both in ministry and in daily life. They need it as much as you. Pray for each other.
• Find a mentor. Now, this is about accountability and growth. Find someone you admire and ask them to help you mature and bloom as a leader. They will be honored and you will be blessed. Pray for each other.
• Schedule regular fun time with a group of your friends. This can be bowling, movie night, softball, basketball or a book club. But it’s just for fun. From fun, comes relationship. But pray for each other as well.

Don’t go it alone any longer. Life is just too short.